I don't look like a movie star. Who will find me attractive?

Fortunately, The Educated Singles Club is not Tinder and fortunately, attractiveness is subjective, and different people are drawn to different qualities. While physical appearance can play a role in attraction, it is not the only factor. Many people find intelligence, personality, and other qualities to be attractive.

As a well-educated person, you likely have many admirable qualities that will appeal to others. You may be curious, insightful, and able to hold meaningful conversations on a variety of topics. You may also have a great sense of humour, empathy, and compassion.

It is important to remember that there is someone for everyone, and there is no one-size-fits-all when it comes to attraction. Keep an open mind and focus on being your authentic self. You may be surprised to find that someone finds you incredibly attractive just the way you are.

Ok, we can be attractive in many different ways, but what about love?

Love is a complex and multifaceted emotion, and there is no specific type of person who will fall in love with someone who is educated and doesn't look like a movie star.

Attraction and compatibility are influenced by a variety of factors such as shared interests, values, personality traits, and physical appearance. While physical appearance can initially catch someone's attention, it is not the sole determinant of whether or not someone will fall in love with another person.

Many people are attracted to intelligence, wit, and a good sense of humour, which are traits that are often associated with someone who is educated. Therefore, it is entirely possible for someone to fall in love with an educated single who may not look like a movie star. Ultimately, the most important thing is to be true to oneself and find someone who appreciates and loves you for who you are.

In that case, what should I focus on in my dating profile?

When creating a dating profile, it's important to highlight your strengths and qualities that you believe will be attractive to potential partners. Here are some tips on what you can focus on:

1. Your personality traits: Highlight your best personality traits that you think will resonate with potential partners. For example, if you are kind, caring, and empathetic, you can emphasise these traits in your profile.
2. Your interests and hobbies: Share your interests and hobbies, as this can help you find someone with similar interests. It also gives others an idea of what you like to do in your free time and what kind of activities you might enjoy doing together.
3. Your educational background and achievements: Since you mentioned you are well-educated, you can mention your educational background and any achievements you have accomplished. This can help attract people who value education and intellectual pursuits.
4. Your sense of humour: If you have a good sense of humour, showcase it in your profile. Humour can be a great way to break the ice and make a connection with someone.
5. Your values and beliefs: Mentioning your values and beliefs can help you find someone who shares similar values and beliefs, which can be an important factor in building a long-term relationship.

Remember to be honest and genuine in your profile. Don't try to be someone you're not, as this can lead to disappointment and frustration down the road.

I want to approach another member of the educated singles club to who I am attracted. What do I write in the first message?

When writing the first message to someone you're interested in, it's important to be respectful, genuine, and engaging. Here are some tips on what you could include in your first message:

1. Compliment something specific: Start by complimenting something specific about the person's profile or picture. This shows that you've taken the time to read their profile and that you're genuinely interested in getting to know them.
2. Mention common interests: If you share any common interests or hobbies, mention them in your message. This can be a great way to start a conversation and build a connection.
3. Ask a question: Ask an open-ended question to encourage the person to respond and keep the conversation going. For example, you could ask about their favourite book, their career, or their travel experiences.
4. Keep it brief: Your first message should be brief and to the point. Avoid writing a lengthy essay, as this can come across as overwhelming or desperate.
5. Be respectful: Remember to be respectful and courteous in your message. Avoid using pickup lines or making inappropriate comments.

Here's an example message that incorporates these tips:

"Hi there, I came across your profile and noticed that we share a passion for [common interest]. I also think your [specific trait, e.g., sense of humour, intelligence] is really impressive. I would love to get to know you better. What's your favourite [question related to the common interest]? Best, [Your name]"

So what's next?

Spend some time reviewing your profile in The Educated Singles Club and make sure to address as many aspects of your personality as possible of your personality. 

It can be difficult to describe a full picture of yourself because you see yourself in a very different way than other people see you. So if you are not too shy, ask some of your best friends why they like being friends with you. Why are you valuable to them?

Their feedback will give you valuable and important content for your dating profile in The Educated Singles Club