relationship

How do I see what drives and maintains a couple’s long-term relationship.

Hard to put a finger on what I see as important in my relationship to a woman I want to commit to, for a lifetime. One thing that is more intuitive than rational is chemistry, I think there is a real biology behind it. The first purpose of a couple is to conceive children, so there must be a match in their genetic makeup; it’s something that can drive our survival and evolution as a species. It is also the fire behind our initial desire and attraction. But it can also sustain the long-term survival of the relationship. It is also behind what some call love at first sight. Next comes values and character, attitude towards loyalty, honesty, altruism and generosity there has to be a match like instruments playing in a band. These drive your personality and determine who you are as an individual. Also here enter qualities such as intelligence and education. There has to be a match at every level to result in something sustainable. Oftentimes I had to break a relationship because there were areas that did not match. Compatibility is not just in higher levels but also being able to understand and laugh at the same jokes. Being able to enjoy being and doing things together. Finally, there is an aspect of non-verbal communication. Being able to communicate thoughts and intentions without words. This is the ballet part of the relationship, the tango that sustains its flow. I hope I covered most, of course, the path to discovery is important in building something that will last.